'Do You Promise To Be True Companions On Life’s Great Adventure?' by Daniel Addercouth

Maybe if you hadn’t tried to do the wedding on the cheap so you’d have more for a down payment, and you’d got a proper caterer instead of your mate’s friend who’s halfway through culinary school, then they wouldn’t be running so late. The guests are hanging around on the lawn behind the hotel with nothing to do except drink and you’re wondering how you’re going to pay for the free bar. Then the rain which has been threatening all day comes on and everyone rushes for the marquee, except here too you went for the cheap option so there’s not enough space and they have to crush together. You ask Chris’s friend Dave who’s supposed to be DJing to put some music on, but he can’t get the sound system to work. Your father, who’s already two-and-a-half sheets to the wind, gets into conversation with the humanist minister, which you know will end in tears, so you hurry over but slip on the oozing ground and end up on your backside, and your dress is filthy and you can’t see Chris anywhere and you’re thinking this? this is supposed to be the best day of my life? but just then Chris turns up with a huge bouquet for you and the caterer arrives with platters laden with food and Dave gets the stereo to work and puts on “Shake It Off” which is Your Song and Chris grabs you by the hand and pulls you into the rain and you dance in the mud and you remember why you’re doing this and in the distance the sun comes out over the hills and a rainbow arcs across the slate sky and although you don’t believe in signs from the universe this sure as hell feels like one.