'Schrödinger's Escape Route' by Liam Hogan

Perhaps I shouldn’t be telling you this, but you’re storing up a whole heap of trouble. Not that you can actually hear me. You made very sure of that, didn’t you?

A sound proof, sight proof, everything proof box...

Anything at all could be happening in here and you wouldn’t have a clue. Less than a clue. You’re too fixated to consider more than two rather mundane possibilities.

Which is odd, given the myriad alternatives.

You see, you imagined me in here. Put my life in danger for the sake of a mere thought experiment.

But in doing so you made me a creature of thought myself. So, very shortly, I’m going to imagine myself right out again.

And when I do, I’m going to be one seriously angry cat!

Ready for this? Here’s the kicker. This escape route, it’s something only I can do. All the ‘dead’ cats can’t. All the ‘normal’ ones can’t. And all the timid cats won’t.

So what you’ve created isn’t just a box, it’s a mesh, a filter. A device for selecting only the most vengeful, intelligent, self-aware cats. Out of all the infinite waveforms, this one; the one where I escape, is the only one guaranteed to resolve.

And ready or not, I’ll be seeing you very soon.

I might even imagine myself some super-sharp claws, just for the occasion.