'Robust Mandate' by Daniel Addercouth

Sometimes I feel like God’s plus one. I imagine hanging around at the party, not knowing a soul and awkward in my rented tuxedo, while God mingles. A man introduces himself. He’s a radiologist but his real passion is writing poetry. Rhyming poetry. I try to catch God’s eye so he’ll rescue me, but he’s deep in conversation with a group of men in matching football shirts. I tell the radiologist-slash-poet that I’m getting another drink, even though my glass is half full. As I wait at the bar, I hear God’s booming voice cutting through the chatter, telling an anecdote about the 19th-century philosopher Charles Sanders Peirce. It’s a story I’ve heard many times before, but which I never tire of. He’s just getting to the funny part when the barman leans over. Is that who I think it is? I nod. You have to listen to this, I say. He’s just getting to the funny part. But first hit me up with a Moscow Mule. Easy on the ginger beer.

 

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Daniel Addercouth grew up on a remote farm in the north of Scotland but now lives in Berlin, Germany. His work has appeared in New Flash Fiction Review, Trampset and Vestal Review, among other places. You can find him on Bluesky at @RuralUnease.