Ah, there's Danny now with the latest word from Mother. Max hears the letterbox pushed open with a squeak. He reminds himself to spend some of his per diem on a can of WD40 (£1.89 for 300ml). Danny's footsteps retreat.
Although they've never met, Max has come to think of that delivery
boy as "Danny". He'd like to say hello, exchange a few idioms. Mother
said to assimilate. Mother also said to lay low.
Max closes the front room blinds, pads into the hall and counts to 50
before easing the latest Lidl leaflet from the slot. Taking a seat at
the kitchen table, he runs a warm iron over the folded sheets. What are
Mother’s instructions this week?
There are bedding plants on the front cover. These mean nothing to
Max. Inside are office supplies. He thinks back to that October
afternoon when, tucked away on page 3, he found the A4 guillotine
(£9.49, with paper guide) and duly carried out his mission. A fine,
Shirts and socks, "Comfortable And Casual", occupy the centre spread.
His gaze comes to rest on the smiling lady in her seamless sleeveless
top (£3.99, sizes 10-24). Max closes his eyes to better picture his
wife's face. He's been too long in this country.
Overleaf is a pets special. Max blinks twice, breathes deep and scans
the page. After all these months, there it is, the electronic cat flap
(£64.95, works with your pet’s existing microchip). Mother says come
Friday, 19 April 2013
'The Latest Lidl Leaflet' by Ed Broom
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Genuis. Love this. :-)ReplyDelete
This is great fun - great sense of suspense and unease, lovey twist! 8-)ReplyDelete
Thanks, BB -- made my day!ReplyDelete