Saturday, 13 June 2026

'Thank you for applying to be my courtly lover' by Chris Cottom

Although we enjoyed reading your ballad, unfortunately it didn’t quite hit the sweetmeat spot for this submission call, and we can only accept a handful of lovers in each window. Actually our windowsills are heaving with wan, lyre-plucking youths moaning how fair I am, how ardently they want to get under my kirtle. Not that they have a chance, with unrequited being the whole point, unless of course they’re as hot as Sir Launcelot. We’ll reopen for regular courtier submissions after Rick’s next crusade and hope we’ll see more from you (loved how you paired ‘wimple’ with ‘pimple’). Keep balladeering!  



Chris Cottom lives near Macclesfield, UK. He’s packed Christmas hampers in a Harrods basement, sold airtime for Radio Luxembourg, and served a twelve-year stretch as an insurance copywriter. He liked the writing job best. Find him at chriscottom.wixsite.com/chriscottom

 

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